Bear with me, but I am a mom and I’m allowed to rave.
This one is about my daughter, Debra, who’s mentioned in Variety etc. Check out the links.
“The Black Power Mixtape 1967-1975” Plays On With Sundance Selects
Anyone Want to be on Television!?!?!?
I’m repeating this blog in case you missed it. I’ve already heard from several folks who either live in California or whose families do, but WEtv is still looking for more people for their show.
Anyone want to be on television?! And, more importantly, receive free counseling.
WEtv is launching a new program in southern California that is designed to help families who are struggling with difficult issues, such as those involving blended families, in-laws, parent/teenagers, eating disorders, bullying, unemployment, divorce, remarriage etc.
The casting director is looking for any nuclear families (children 10 or older) that would be interested in free counseling by Dr. Tara Fields, of Oprah, CNN, Dr. Phil fame. She would interview the family in their own home or in her office over the course of a week. The network would then provide additional counseling for six weeks. They realize the seven weeks in total won’t solve problems but they are hopeful it will help families have a breakthrough.
The interviews will be taped and then will air on WEtv. There is no studio audience. If you live in southern California (which I’m envious given the winter we’re having!) or if you know someone who does, and you or they would be interested in being on this show, please let me know. Families who appear will receive a $2,000 honorarium in addition to the free therapy.
Email me at ellie@ellieslottfisher.com. If you’d like, I can put you in touch with the casting director.
11
Feb
2011
Feb
2011
A Taciturn Mother-in-Law Equals a Happy Grandparent
I just got off the phone with a woman I interviewed for It’s Either Her or Me. At the time of the interview, she hadn’t seen her grandchildren in more than two years. After years of hurtful exchanges between her and her daughter-in-law, she was effectively cut out of her grandchildren’s lives. Guess where she’s heading next weekend?
She’s flying north to New England to spend a long weekend with her son, his wife, and her two grandchildren. So what changed?
“I apologized. I apologized for everything. Even things I didn’t do,” she tells me with an ironic laugh. “It’s been great. I’ve been in touch with my family and my grandkids and now I’m spending the weekend with them.”
How difficult was it for this mom – let’s call her Jill – to apologize for some missteps and misunderstandings? “I thought it would be hard to do but it really wasn’t, and I’m certainly happy with the outcome.”
Flashback to when her daughter-in-law was pregnant. Jill couldn’t resist criticizing her for quitting her job long before her due date. That put so much pressure on my son! If it did, then that was up to the couple to decide. And then came the birth of the baby and Jill mustered up her inner Dr. Spock and freely offered parenting advice. So what’s wrong with that? New moms don’t want advice unless they ask for it. A lot of what we do as new moms is instinctive, anyway. We don’t want to hear what may have been the popular thinking 30 years earlier. Gad, we’d still be washing diapers!
When Jill says she apologized for “everything” even though, between you and me and her, she didn’t really think she had done anything so egregious, she learned a valuable lesson. New moms may be novices but they’re well-informed; they may be sleep-deprived but they’re euphoric; they may be emotionally fraught but they’re madly in love with their new baby. The last thing they want to hear from another person – ESPECIALLY the mother –in-law – is that they are bad moms. Although a mother-in-law offers advice out of love for her grandchild, such un-asked-for advice is usually viewed as critique.
Even if you’re the mother-in-law who feels you haven’t done anything to warrant the cold shoulder, consider the effect of swallowing your pride, doing a couple mea culpas, and reaching out.
Look what’s waiting for you on the other end.
06
Feb
2011
Feb
2011
Anyone Want to Be on Television?!?!
And, more importantly, receive free counseling.
WEtv is launching a new program in southern California that is designed to help families who are struggling with difficult issues, such as those involving blended families, in-laws, parent/teenagers, eating disorders, bullying, unemployment, divorce, remarriage etc.
The casting director is looking for any nuclear families (children 10 or older) that would be interested in free counseling by Dr. Tara Fields, of Oprah, CNN, Dr. Phil fame. She would interview the family in their own home or in her office over the course of a week. The network would then provide additional counseling for six weeks. They realize the seven weeks in total won’t solve problems but they are hopeful it will help families have a breakthrough.
The interviews will be taped and then will air on WEtv. There is no studio audience. If you live in southern California (which I’m envious given the winter we’re having!) or if you know someone who does, and you or they would be interested in being on this show, please let me know. Families who appear will receive a $2,000 honorarium in addition to the free therapy.
Email me at ellie@ellieslottfisher.com.
04
Feb
2011
Feb
2011
Elizabeth Edwards, the Lady
The news of Elizabeth Edwards’ passing is profoundly sad. When most of us were first introduced to her a decade ago, her lifestyle invoked envy; a successful lawyer, a loving mother, the wife of a perpetually-youthful looking and seemingly devoted husband. And as we’ve long ago discovered about First Ladies and potential First Ladies, she was the brilliance behind her man.
We tried to rectify that she had already endured a tragedy – the unspeakable, unthinkable nightmare of every parent – the death of her son. He was only 16. A star. And he died suddenly in a car crash.
We admired her for overcoming the loss, and envied her for her entry onto the political stage. And then her next tragedy arrived with the nuance of a summer thunderstorm, leaving destruction in its wake. It was a diagnosis of breast cancer. And then, as the world knows too well, came the one tragedy that could have been averted. It was her husband’s lying, scandalous behavior – when she was SICK – and it resulted in a child out of wedlock.
Still every time Elizabeth Edwards graced the media, it was with stoic poise and aplomb.
Personally, as a writer, I have always been impressed with the articulateness with which she spoke. I have read excerpts from her book, and have been captivated by the richness of her prose. Most political memoirs, if not ghostwritten, are heavily edited. I believe neither is the case in Edwards’ book. Her impromptu speech had always been so aesthetically laced; I doubt she needed anyone to help her think.
I am always reluctant to give voice to the notion that people are never given more than they can bear. Even though she had endured too much, she never seemed to lose sight of her priorities, which without question, were her children.
We can remember Elizabeth Edwards one of two ways; the woman filled with so much sorrow that appeared weaker and weaker in the waning weeks of her life, or the vibrant, smiling woman we watched hold her husband’s hand on the stage at the Democratic National Convention. For most of us, that was the first time we met her. And for me at least, that’s the way I intend to remember her.
12
Dec
2010
Dec
2010
